How to be Truly Happy this Christmas Season and Stay Happy Always

Recently, I came across an article on Forbes titled “Your Success Can Be Predictable, Even Inevitable.” That sounds very audacious yet it is true and the underlying reason for this is that success depends on principles: if you know how to go about achieving your desire and follow through, you can always realize it.

Simple, isn’t it?

Oh yes! It is.

There are many things we want: money, sound health, quality relationships, etc. I have previously written that success is not to be pursued but attracted. When you do the right things to align with your desires, you attract what you want.

Therefore, your happiness is predictable – even inevitable. I want to share with you 6 irrefutable laws of happiness that can catapult you to that universally-desired realm of bliss and keep you energized always. The first part emphasize what you need to know to become happy. The second part pertains to what you must do to stay happy.

Ready? Here they are:

1. No one is responsible for your happiness except you

Unless you take responsibility for your choices, actions, behaviours and results, you will always be at the mercy of men and circumstances. And guess what? People will only use you to better their own lives. If your life must be better, then you have to take responsibility for yourself.

No one is supposed to make you happy by their actions or inactions. Not your spouse. Not your children. Not your friend, colleague or boss!

One of the basic laws of human nature is that each man does what promotes his own interests. The primary focus is his interest – which means that your interest is an option to another man.

In fact, when you shift responsibility from yourself, you unconsciously disempower yourself and empower your supposed object of responsibility to control your life in tragic ways. Little wonder, Alice Walker remarked, “The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don't have any.”

So, you have to make yourself happy – always. Own your problems. Take responsibility for your desires and dreams. Don’t expect anybody to read your mind. You want a gift? Buy one for yourself even before you begin to expect any from your loved ones. Don’t wait for someone to take you out – take yourself out if you’ve got the means.

You can read further on this here.

2. Happiness is neither an event nor a destination but a by-product of your way of life

"I will be happy tomorrow because Ronke will bring me the gift she promised me." "I will happy when I catch some fun at the Christmas party." "I will ... I will ... I will ..."

Because many see happiness as a destination, they chase it – and never find it because, as King Solomon says, it is like chasing the wind. Happiness is actually an outcome of how you live your life.

Nutritionists often use the age-long proverb “You are what you eat” to explain that we need to eat good food to stay healthy. For this reason, in the opening chapter of his book, DREAM Health, Dr Brian Wilmovsky describes how many people (adults especially) are committing slow suicide by the way they eat.

We ought, therefore, to heed Hippocrates’ advice: “Let food be thy medicine, and let medicine be thy food.”

By the way, I recently found that sugar increases your risk of depression and mood disorders! Read more on that here.

As your food determines your health, so your thoughts and words determine your happiness. In other words, you are what you think and what you say (these are the springs of your life). Your thoughts and confessions regulate your feelings, actions, behaviours and results. So, if you must be happy, control what you think (and how you think about it) and what you say.

3. Living to prove someone wrong and/or to win another’s approval are unhappy ways to live

This principle flows from the first: you have to take responsibility for your life. And to do so, you must stay true to yourself. Happiness is a product of alignment to your core. Every time, you shift from that alignment, you become insecure and restless and this affects your performance externally.

One reason many people do not align with their core is that they are trying to prove someone wrong or win another’s approval. By doing so, they put themselves at the mercy of men. And men are good at re-positioning the goal post to suit them – not you.

Eleanor Brown has rightly said, “Some people won't love you, no matter what you do. Some people won't STOP loving you, no matter what you do. Go where the love is.”

To protect your happiness, you would have to set boundaries to keep off toxic people from getting too close to you. And invest in quality relationships that help you to BE YOU and BECOME A BETTER YOU.

You know a real friend when he or she believes in you in all seasons of your life. They don’t even hurry you out of those night seasons when your dreams are forming; when your seeds are taking root without any external appearances, when you are being prepared for the day. They encourage and empower you to stay true to your core.

Such people are priceless gifts but we often ignore and even lose them when we focus on the toxic people in our lives – and forgo that all-important, energizing state of happiness that could always be ours.

Watch out for the second part next week on how to stay unapologetically, radically and fully happy.

To your success,

Bright UK

The Chief Scribe